If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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