What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

Turkey Balls

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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