Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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