The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You know whats annoying? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops