whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

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speak now or forever hold your pee

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three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

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There was a boy and..........his dad said to go to the store to get his daily thing.........he went to the store and bought it......he came home and said.....HERE ARE THE EGGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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nathan your cats dead now...well hopefully

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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