Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

Who is big and stupid My brother

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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