Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Where's Wally? In a children's book.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

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What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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