Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not quite sure, but I just realized that my new pair of boxer briefs has ripped along the seam. Oh, and earlier this morning, I stubbed my toe pretty bad. The nail is all purple and the toe is all swollen, it was bleeding profusely until I put three bandages over the wound. It's still throbbing with pain. Oh, and also, a few months ago, I lost my job. It wasn't because I was constantly late or anything, it was more because as a server, I had been required to lift trays and stand and walk for the entirety of my shift. The only problem is, that about a year ago, I was involved in a serious car accident (once again, an occurrence that had not been due to my own actions). This car accident severed my spine in the L5 region. I can now barely walk for long periods of time, I find it impossible to run, I can no longer play sports and enjoy being a 21 year old male. I am in constant pain and it affects my breathing, my legs, the rest of my back, and also my teeth (due to the neurological connections dealing with the spinal cord). I am now currently looking for a new job, a more suitable job, to help sustain my hectic lifestyle. No, it is not a lifestyle of parties and what not, it is merely the lifestyle of living under roof and owning a used car. I have an alcoholic mother and my childhood was devoid a father. I raised myself, and to this day, I still have no family to help me through my financial struggles. I need nearly 2000 dollars in less than a week in order to pay all my bills, have my car fixed, and eat for another month. The only problem is, I have a dollar and 58 cents to my name. I wish I was this chicken, crossing roads, and what not, not just to get to the other side, but to live a better life. But, one can only wish.

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's rape??

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what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

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Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

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What to hear an anti-joke? No.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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