A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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asdasdasdasd

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Refridgerator.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

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What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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All of these jokes are about white people

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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