Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops