Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

Roses are smiling, violets are trying to kill me. DId I mention I'm a paranoid schizophrenic?

Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

an emo girl walked into a white room

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...