A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who grants them three wishes. The brunette wishes to go back home. The redhead wishes to go back home too. The blonde misses her friends, so she wishes to go back home too.

*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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