What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How many chicken nuggets can fit into an olympic size swimming pool? A: 8,563,690,152... Corndogs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how does a a fat person dance? with his feet

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I'm Coming

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops