Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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