What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

Q: What do you call a nun in a wheelchair A: Handicapped.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.It is a very simple task for somebody who knows what to do.

tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

AIDS

What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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