A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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A man went skydiving and tragically died.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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