What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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Q: Are their Jews in Hell? A: No, because Hitlers there

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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