Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

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Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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