What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

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Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

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What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops