What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

thumb_up thumb_down

Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

thumb_up thumb_down

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

thumb_up thumb_down

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

thumb_up thumb_down

Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock the door's open, come in

thumb_up thumb_down

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Dislike if you are a prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops