What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Justin with a hat.

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Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops