Wait! hundred billions!

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Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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TIMMY

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops