Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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