What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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