What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops