why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

I like that, but why am I happy?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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