scraggle is in you pillow case

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

What's frozen and eaten off a stick? Your dead uncle Norman

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Why did Mary fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Who pushed johnny of the cliff? Certainly not Mary

Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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