if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

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What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

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Why did the hockey cross the road? To get to KFC.

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Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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T u r n i p s

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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