Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the giant scorpion sad? Because the Holocaust killed his entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Have you heard of the mute man that kept telling people he could not talk? Its funny because its true.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A muslim walks into a gun shop

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did the carrot say to the rabbit? stop eating me you son of a B*****

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops