Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Wanna hear a good joke? Sure. So does Hellen Keller

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Poop

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What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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