What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

What's up? Your time.

what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

how many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? none, they hire mexicans to do it

why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

Whats brown and sticky? A stick

what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

what happened to your carpool? they died.

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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