What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Why? Why not?

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 6's boss, has been sexually assaulting 6 for years at work, but 6 needs the money too bad to say anything or quit his job.

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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The chicken crossed the road.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops