How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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kkkk

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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My Nan, that is all.

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Misner is a twat.

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How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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