KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

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What's hanging by a rope from the tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops