How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops