Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

A woman was strolling around town when she turned into a dark alley. She was cold and scared. Suddenly a ferocious looking man jumped out with a knife. The end.

Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

what is the difference between a car salesman and a lawyer? a car salesman sells cars to people while a lawyer is an expert in law.

What do you tell your dad if he constantly gripes about his balls? He's got testicular cancer and he's going to die a horrible painful death.

one morning i turned on my tv

Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya" the man replies: "whisky."

What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

Why do fat people commit suicide

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

You want to hear a joke? Republican

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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