What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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96

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

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When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He simply lost grip of the cone and it fell out of his hand

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops