What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? Twister

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

What is white, black and blue all over? A zebra that was assaulted by Chuck Norris.

If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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