Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

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What did the Mexican man say to the black man? Hello, how are you today?

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

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What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

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BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots, "Long day?", the bartender asks. "Yeah", the man replies, then he goes home and hangs himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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