i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

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what do u call a apple a apple

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what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

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hear hear

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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SUCK MY NUTS

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A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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