What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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