- Anti Joke

There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

Did you hear about the guy who lost his arm and leg in a car crash? Well, he just died in hospital. RIP.

what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

David Cameron

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

So there once was this wasp that lived in a jungle. This was not your ordinary wasp though-he was smart, philosophical even. One day he finally got fed up with his repetitive, insignificant life and decided that he would leave his hive, his family, his entire close-knit wasp community and he would go out into the world and make something of himself, just like the humans do. So the wasp enrolls in school, and passes with flying colors. Remember, this is a very smart wasp. He gets his high school diploma in a little under 3 years, with a 4.0 GPA and all that snazz. After high school, believe it or not, the wasp gets accepted to Harvard. Harvard! This too proves to be no challenge for our hero, as he graduates in just two years, again a 4.0, on the Dean's list, and all that snazz. Not to mention all the clubs and sports he was in-the newspaper, rowing, student government-and the fact that he was by far the most popular student on campus. Even his professors looked up to him. He goes on to get two PhDs, and when he finishes his education, the wasp faces a bit of a dilemma. How does he apply his knowledge now? Where does he go from here? He decides to try out politics. After all, he was popular throughout school, did well in Harvard government. So he runs for mayor, and wins in a landslide. He greatly reforms the city, fixing virtually all its major problems. He runs for governor and again wins in a landslide. Two years later, the presidential election was coming up, and the wasp decides he might as well go for it. Of course, he wins in the largest landslide in US presidential history. His presidency goes exceedingly well-he is loved by all parties, and has the highest approval ratings in history. He also finds the cures for cancer, AIDS, and broken hearts while in the White House. After 8 years (yes, of course he was reelected) the time has come for him to leave his office. Even his successor his saddened by the wasp’s departure, but they all know it’s what must be done. Back at his vacation home in California his first day after leaving office, the wasp looks back on his long and fruitful life. He realizes that he hasn't been back to his hive at all since that first day he left. He suddenly feels a twang of guilt as he realizes how much he misses his parents and his little brother. So he heads back to the hive, looking more worn out than he remembers. He goes inside and greets his family, who are overjoyed at the sight of him. He talks about how his life has gone as his family listens in wonderment. Eventually he decides he is thirsty, so he decides to visit the old watering hole he remembered. Once he gets there though, there’s an extremely long line. He decides it’s worth the wait, so gets in line. One hour. Two hours. This is the slowest moving line he’s ever seen! Eventually he calculates that it could be a few days before he gets to the front of the line, so decides it’s not worth it. He decides to go get some cider to drink instead, but waddya know, another huge line of people waiting for cider! He remembers one other drinking area that never had a long line-fruit punch! So he decides to go get punch. He arrives, and lo and behold, there's no punch line.

What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

whats worse than finding a worm in apple? being chased by retards

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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