Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

Did you hear about the dyslexic that choked on his own vimto?

sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

anti-joke.ru - russian style

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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