Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

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Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

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what are three short words? i a am

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

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What is worse than tripping over a stone, and falling face first into a dog shit, Not much..

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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