Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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Reading the Terms and Conditions

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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Q: What does a gay horse eat? A: Cheese

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

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The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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Whats worse then hell? The guy who commited suicide would know.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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In 1843 when Man invented the moon, people set sail on ironclad ships to lands that sold items that weren't for sale in similar such stores in other lands not reachable by ironclad ships or dirigibles as they became known once they changed form completely and were a differentobject entirely and of no use for water transport. That's when the real revolution in telecommunications began, the truck drivers would use CB radios as early as 1287 and 1276 in Canada. the CB radio enabled the users to order pizza and develop symbiotic relationshiops with canvas. Amongst other things.

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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