What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

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A Mormon walks into a bar.

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Did you hear about the blind man who got stuck by a bus? Poor guy never saw it coming.

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how many pieces of wood can a lumberjack cut in a minute? three dead squrlles a hat and and half of a tree oh and a bus. and if u get in his way alot of guts spewed every where

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

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Your face

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What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I blackmailed his family with rape from Ronald mcdonald

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you know whats worse than being cold? being colder

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops