2 nuns in the bath, One says "wears the soap" the other says "Over there, next to the shampoo"

Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

People...

knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

69

There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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