Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why did Edna fall off a cliff? Edna is blind, and so lacks the visual perception and spatial awareness of other hillwalkers.

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Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

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What if the rest of you value something wrong?

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A black man, a white man and a Mexican are in a car... Who is driving... A police man

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

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What happened to the newlywed couple who couldn't tell the difference between KY jelly and window putty? All their windows fell out.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

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"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

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Let's not pick mushrooms in heaven.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Docter Docter who? Yes its me, Craig Who your docter, I have the test results back Im afriad its positive,you've only got a few months left

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A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

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Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

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Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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