Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

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i don't get it...none of these are funny.

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why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

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Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

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Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

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why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side (The original AntiJoke)

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Loading....please wait.

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Doorbell salesman.

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Q:Whats the difference between a black man and a park bench? A: A park bench can support a family.

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Knock knock. Is someone there?

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This one time at band camp....

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops