This is not a joke.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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:/ Meh, I am just a side character anyways... Dont really care...

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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One day, on a train. 30 white, violently, racist people where crowding a black man minding his own business. An asian person walked through and was kicked, stabbed and stomped on until he died.

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whats brown? poop.

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What do you call a depressed nerd who plays WoW. Me....

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hi patrick

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the real mccoy

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What did the veterinarian say to the dog? Ohhh who is a good dog? You are!

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an asian walks into a bar and does his math homework then he gets raped by a horse

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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Two cows were on a field, one cow say "moo", the other... didn't say anything because it wasn't a cow

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What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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What do you call a man that goes to work every day to provide for his family? A spoon

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Hi

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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What's worse than a spider bite? Two spider bites. What's worse than two spider bites? The fact that 1/3 of people get cancer. What's worse than that? Three spider bites.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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How did Muhammed Ali get into Professional Boxing? With a lot of hard work and dedication.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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