Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson who? Shut up and give me ma dam candy women!

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

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I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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Thumbs this down

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What do you get when you mix black, white, and Asian? A panda bear

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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