Chuck Norris died.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

thumb_up thumb_down +20

hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: what happens when you throw a red rock into a blue lake? A: a splash.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black guy flying a helicopter? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops