Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

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A man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is crippling his family.

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Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

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Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

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Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

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Q: What do you call a black man sitting on a bench? A: Whatever his name is.

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops