What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

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A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

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Vagina-Boob

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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maddie latino

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8=D

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

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When life gives you lemons...you probably just found lemons.

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Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops