What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

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A man walks into a bar.

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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what do you get when you throw a refrigerator at a boy on a bike? a severely injured boy, a lawsuit , a police record and a prison mate

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What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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Water, please.

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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alcoholism kills

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Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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